IELTS writing – sample essay 8

IELTS Essay, topic: the positive and the negative sides of globalization

Even though globalization affects the world’s economies in a positive way, its negative side should not be forgotten. Discuss.

In the present age, globalization is playing an increasingly important role in our lives. But in the meantime whether it is a blessing or a curse has sparked a heated debate. Some people argue that globalization has a fundamentally beneficial influence on our lives, while many others contend that it has a detrimental effect as well.

A convincing argument can be made about globalization not only playing a pivotal role in the development of technology and economy, but also promoting the cultural exchange between different countries. To start with, it is the globalization that impelled many corporate to become international groups, thereby making a contribution to the local technology and employment. Specifically, when a multinational group establish a factory in a developing country, the new equipment, the new management skills and the job vacancies are all in the best interest of the local society. Moreover, people worldwide can get to know each other better through globalization. It is easy to see that more and more Hollywood blockbusters show cultures different from American, some recent examples are ‘Kungfu Panda’ and ‘The Mummy’.


Admittedly, the profit driven side of globalization has severely affected young people. Today, in the metropolises in different countries, it is very common to see teenagers wearing NIKE T-shirts and Adidas footwear, playing Hip-Hop music on Apple iPods and eating at KFC. The culture that took a thousand years to form just seems similar in these cities; it seems as though you can only distinguish them by their language. Meanwhile, in some developing countries, sweat workshops are always a concerning issue. For instance, reports show that some teenagers employed by NIKE’s contractors work in smelly factories over 14 hours a day, but are only paid fifty cents per hour.

To sum up, I would concede that globalization does come with some adverse effects. Despite that fact, benefits created by it far outweigh the disadvantages. Overall, I am convinced that we should further promote globalization and meanwhile the local government should take measures to combat culture assimilation and sweat workshops.

This essay is extremely long (338 words instead of the advised 250-265). It has a sound structure, your position is clearly expressed, the information is well-organized, and structure-wise the sentences are fine. The vocabulary is impressive and there were only a few grammatical errors (see comments underlined in blue). Overall, this seems to be a band 7.5 + essay.

IELTS writing – sample essay 7

IELTS Essay, topic: children and rules

In some countries children have very strict rules of behavior, in other countries they are allowed to do almost anything they like. To what extent should children have to follow rules?

The extent to which children have to follow rules is in itself a very complex issue, since children across the world grow up in very different cultures. In India for example, children are expected to be very submissive to their parents as well as other adults around them. This, however, is not the case with the Western countries of the world where children follow the motto ‘Thou shalt do what thou wilt’ as promoted by celebrities and rock stars. I believe that following strict rules has both advantages as well as serious drawbacks as discussed below.

Firstly, strict rules of behavior create responsible and respectful children who in turn mature into respectful adults. This forms a stable society which is virtually free from negative trends such as prostitution and drug abuse. Secondly, if children do not follow strict rules of behavior, they may get out of hand and become work-shy and indolent. This may then create a burden on the society since the government has to find ways to cater for these social ills.

However, forcing children to follow strict rules of behavior doesn’t always yield positive results as discussed above, most of the time it backfires and works against society. For example, teenagers are more likely to do the opposite of what they’re told to do simply because they want to be independent. Children should also have rights to exercise their free will and develop their own pattern of behaviors. Imposing strict rules may simply destroy the individuality of children.

At the end of the day, it is clear that children should be guided by rules, but these rules should not be imposed on them because as human beings, they need to have room to develop their own traits of character and adopt a behavioral pattern of their own.

This essay is too long (309 words instead of advised 250-265). Otherwise this work is a very good one; it covers the task, your position is clear, the ideas are well-organized, expressed, explained and supported. The sentences show a wide range of language structures, cohesive devices and your grammar is fine. Overall, this seems to be a band 7.5 or higher essay.

IELTS writing – sample essay 6

IELTS Essay, topic: The advantages and disadvantages of globalization

Even though globalization affects the world’s economies in a very positive way, its negative side should not be forgotten. Discuss.

Globalization is such a commonly used term in the twentieth century. It simply means that the world has become integrated economically, socially, politically and culturally through the advances of technology, transportation and communication. It is undeniable that globalization has resulted in both positive and negative effects which must be addressed accordingly.

To begin with, globalization has contributed to the world’s economies in many beneficial ways. The advances in science and technology have allowed businesses to easily cross over territorial boundary lines. Consequently, companies tend to become more productive and competitive thereby raising the quality of goods, services and the world’s living standard.

Secondly, several companies from the more developed countries have already ventured to establish foreign operations or branches to take advantage of the low cost of labor in the poorer countries. This kind of business activity will provide more influx of cash or investment funds into the less developed countries. 

However, one cannot deny the negative effects which have derived from globalization. One crucial social aspect is the risk and danger of epidemic diseases which can easily be spread as the transportation becomes easier and faster in today’s advanced society. This is evidenced in the recent birds flu disease which has infected most Asian countries over a short period of time.

As large corporations invest or take over many offshore businesses, a modern form of colonization will also evolve which may pose certain power pressure on the local governments of the less developed countries. Unemployment rates in the more developed regions such as Europe may also escalate as corporations choose to outsource to the cheaper work force from Asian countries.

In conclusion. I like to reiterate that globalization is inevitable and we must urge individuals, companies and governments to use a more balanced approach by taking the appropriate steps to deal with matters relating to the financial or economical gains verses the social, political or ecological concerns of the world.

This essay is too long, 318 words instead of 250-265. Otherwise (except for some minor grammatical errors) it is a very nice work. It covers the task, has the right structure, the paragraphs are coherent and are logically connected by elegantly used linking words, the structure of sentences is fine and so is your vocabulary. Seems worthy of Band 7.5 or 8.

IELTS writing – sample essay 5

IELTS Essay, topic: Financial education

Financial education should be a mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It is an obvious fact that financial aspects are a major part of the daily life, as an adult and even as a young individual. Each and every one of us has to make financial decisions concerning recreation, health, education and more. The question is whether to start with financial education as part of school program or to postpone it for a later stage in life.

To begin with, being able to understand the value of money, the way the economic system works and to interpret financial news and its implications is a virtue. Without this virtue, an individual, even a young one, might suffer to some extent. For an example, a child who doesn’t understand the concept of money might find it more difficult to except choosing only one present out of more possible ones.

In addition, many adults are lacking capability of financial analysis. Quite often, the reason can be the lack of sound foundations or insecurity when it comes to financial terms and concepts. Starting from an early age, building a strong background, can very likely prevent such situation.

However, financial education necessarily involves quantifying and setting prices and value for services and goods. It can easily turn young people into cynical human beings who lack emotion. Furthermore, a tendency to self-concentration and egoism might rise when one start measuring everything from a profit-making perspective.

In conclusion, financial education has both pros and cons. In my opinion, the advantages are more significant than the disadvantages, making financial education an advisable component of the school program. The disadvantages should be thought of as a certain price that young people have to pay due to the characteristics of the world that we live in.

This is a wonderful essay. It covers the task, is correctly structured, the paragraphs are logically connected, the structure of sentences shows excellent command of the English language. The vocabulary is fine and both spelling and grammar are very good. See comments underlined in blue for some minor corrections. Overall, looks like a Band 7.5 – Band 8 essay.

IELTS writing – sample essay 4

IELTS Essay, topic: Computers replacing teachers

As computers are being used more and more in education, there will be soon no role for teachers in the classroom.

There have been immense advances in technology in most aspects of people’s lives, especially in the field of education. Nowadays, an increasing number of students rely on computers for research and to produce a perfect paper for school purposes. Others have decided to leave the original way of learning and to get knowledge through online schools. These changes in the learning process have brought a special concern regarding the possible decrease of importance of teachers in the classroom.

Some people believe the role of teachers started to fade because computers have been helping some students to progress in their studies quicker compared to studies in an original classroom. For example, in the same classroom, students have different intellectual capacities, thus some would be tied to a slow advance in their studies because of others’ incapability of understanding. In this way, pupils could progress in their acquisition of knowledge at their own pace using computers instead of learning from teachers. 

However, the presence of a teacher is essential for students because the human contact influences them in positive ways. Firstly, students realize that they are not dealing with a machine but with a human being who deserves attention and respect. They also learn the importance of studying in a group and respect for other students, which helps them improve their social skills.

Moreover, teachers are required in the learning process because they acknowledge some students’ deficiencies and help them to solve their problems by repeating the same explanation, giving extra exercises or even suggesting a private tutor. Hence, students can have a better chance of avoiding a failure in a subject.

In conclusion, the role for teachers in the learning process is still very important and it will continue to be such in the future because no machine can replace the human interaction and its consequences.

This is a great essay. Seems worthy of Band 8. No improvements are necessary, keep up the good work!